Kia dealers in UK are getting tired of cleaning up after pigeons that … ehem… crap on their shiny new cars on the forecourts! So they are taking action against them.

Don’t worry, its not violent. They are hiring local pigeon fanciers to create ‘Feather Free Zones.’ Who knew that could become a profession some day!

Before the summer influx of migrating birds hit the UK and make a mess of Kia’s inventory, they are dispatching flocks of bird experts so in collaboration with expert pigeon fanciers in their local areas, they divert large populations of wild birds from the gleaming body work of the sales fleet and into local parks and woodlands. This is probably cheaper than constantly washing the cars. Kia says the birds target red and black cars most of all.

If it didn’t work they should hire some yobs with shotguns, just shooting birds down!

Stephen Kitson, Communications Director at Kia, said: ‘No-one looks forward to their shiny new motor being splattered by low-flying pigeons, crows, starlings or even worse – seagulls! And our dealers are always striving to keep forecourts looking their best.

‘We have brought dealers and local experts together to come up with a humane method to solve the problem. Pigeon fanciers understand birds’ migratory patterns, behaviours and local topography, so they’re perfectly placed to advise Kia dealers on keeping their forecourts Feather Free Zones.’

Pigeon expert Joe Kerr, who has co-ordinated the initiative, said: ‘When Kia approached me with this idea, I thought they were having a laugh. After all, how can you tell a wild bird where to take its toilet breaks? But I’ve kept pigeons for over forty years; I love birds and any scheme that helps people realise they’re a pleasure, not a mere pest, is worth getting involved with.’